ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
