We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
