Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
