i just sent this text using only my big toe
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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