then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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