You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
tell me about the eggs
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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