your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Just puked most of my soul out..
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize