We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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