omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I didn't notice because vodka
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Randomize
