Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.