I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I can't turn off my feet"
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
