Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
