Define "chronic" masturbator.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize