You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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