There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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