with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
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