How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
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