New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
