I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize
