Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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