U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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