so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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