I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
