I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
