Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
