Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize