Will you blow on my dice?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize