Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
