yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
your room smells of hookers.
And success
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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