Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
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