i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
My vagina is officially offended.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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