it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
