you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
