ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Randomize
