She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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