The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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