I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
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