Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Even the bartender felt bad for me
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize