Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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