Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
