How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
