Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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