I want to walk on stilts...naked
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize