I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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