I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
