I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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