giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
i believe in u and ur pee
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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