I hate your face
To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Everyone says I win the strip club
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize