I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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