May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
