after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
